Monday, February 28, 2011

Why People Read My Blog

Warning. This entry is full of me being full of myself. And O yea a bunch of nonsense too. Please refrain Urself from reading my blog if U r not full of Urself either, and wish that U weren't me. Haha~

1. My blog is full of the nonsense people want to read about.

2. People are just so darn bored with their life.

3. People mostly don't have anything to do, so they happen to find the link to my blog in Facebook, so they decided to read it....and later ask themselves "WHY IN THE WORLD DID I CLICKED? WHY GOD, WHY??? AM I BEING PUNISHED??"

4. They fell in love with the author. . . (is it wrong for a girl to dream? =P)

5. Just for the purpose of stalking me. Darn U stalkers! First my facebook, then my twitter, and now my blog? O man ur creepy...

6. I didn't do anything about the stalkers. And most of the time I let myself get stalk. Bukan selalu kan kena stalk ni....Hua3

7. Because I'm awesome?

8. They are afraid about what I'll write about them. He.he.he........ =p

9. A virus attacked their laptops or PCs (or Macs?) that keeps on opening A very genius plan there Zen... He.he.he....

10. They are searching for a picture of me in my blog. Kan orang muda mudi sekarang suka letak gmbar diorang sendiri dalam blog? Hahaha~ Keep on looking guys... (Ok, perasan kejap...)

11. Because I'm Jard's sister? (darn U Jard!!)

12. Because I'm awesome...still?

13. They like to read my blog coz it's funny. (Seriously guys, is it FUNNY? That's a shocker there.... I think my dog can write funnier things than me..)

14. They pity me. No one reads my blog, so just because of the sake of being my friend, they check out my blog. Thanks guys... But, don't force Urself.... U don't have to read it if U don't want to.... Sob sob....Isk Isk.... (Terharu menangis menarik-tertarik hingus)

15. I like to list things out. Easier.

16. I like to put spaces in my sentences. Easier for people to read.

17. My blog is environmental friendly. No plants or animals were harm during the production of any of my blog entries. Just wasting electricity, Ur time, Ur sweat, and plus hurting Ur eyes reading my blog.

18. Because I'm SUPER AWESOME! Can't deny that one.

19. Because I'm a goddess sent from hell. (eh? mesti ni pengaruh anime.....ish3)

20. Ah! Malas dah nak fikir! Ok lah.. Untuk menyedapkan hati para jejaka (betulkah bahasa aku ni?) yang nak sangat tengok gambar aku, Khas untuk entri kali ini, I will post my picture in my blog. Enjoy~

Let's start with my baby picture.

Cute kan?

And this is how I look like now.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

I'm Not That Nice`

Satu luahan hati dan minda dan keter'rajin'an tangan ak menaip. Beware! This is all full of nonsense! Don't read if U dun like reading nonsense!!!

U've been warned..

A friend of mine asked me one day.

Eca: Zen! Napa ko ni baik sangat?

Me: Aku? Baik? Hahaha! Bila masa pulak?

Eca: Ye lah, ko selalu tolong aku, and bila aku datang bilik ko culik laptop ko, ko tak pernah nak marah.. Eh...ya....ko pandai marah orang tak??

Me: Marah? Ofkos lah pandai sayang oi.

Eca: Aku tak pernah nampak ko marah....Zen, napa ko ni baik sangat ye?

Haish.....Am I that nice? I don't think so...

Tetiba teringat lak semula memori Form 1. Zaman masih lagi main bubut-bubut (kejar2) ngan kawan, zaman bertanding beg siapa lagi cantik, zaman jahil2 lagi selalu bergusti ngan kazen2 laki gue pastu selalu aku selalu menang...ah....good times.....

Tapi masa tu, soalan yang sama (not really the same lah) ditujukan kepadaku oleh seorang kawan yang aku kenal sejak Darjah 6 sekolah rendah.

Let's just call her Z.

Z: Zen....kalau aku tanya ko ni, jangan marah ah?

Zen: (tengah menconteng buku teks kawan) Tanya jak lah...

Z: Uhm........

Zen: Cakap jak..

Z: Uhm....KO ni lesbian ka?

Zen: .................................


Aku yang time tu tengah lukis kaki manusia tiba2 terlukis kaki ayam yang macam chopstik.

Zen: Huh?????!

Z: Ya lah bah. Ko terlalu baik bah ngan kami. (Kami is referring to my girl friends lah)

Zen: Ha? (masih terkejut)

Z: Jadi ko lesbian ka ni tidak??

Zen: Lesbian? Aku? Hahaha! Tidak lah! Aku suka ngan laki ok.....Ish3....

Z: Fiuh....nasib baik... Lain kali jangan baik betul bah...nanti aku salah faham....

Zen: . . . . . . . .

Seriously that was the one question that I remembered till this day.....
Sorry Z, but I was really shocked..

But seriously, am I.......(gulp)...nice??

I don't think so oh.....
I can be evil at times..


These are a list of things that shows I'm actually evil.

1. I the that people will step on it! Kejam kan? Haha

2. I can use my EVIL and BRILLIANT mind to make people's just that I don't want to show it yet... Nanti lah.. When the time comes.. He.he.he...

3. I laugh at people who fell! Haha!! U fell to the ground! U funny! Haha! Haha! (this is a total fabrication...I don't laugh.....kan Tini?? KFC??)

4. I laugh at people a lot. Regardless of what they look like, what they wear, their...uhm...gender and such. I laugh at the least probable cause. I laugh even when there's nothing to laugh at, so that people will start asking why I laugh. Then I'd laugh again seeing how much they wanted to know why I laugh, it's torture to some of them. Haha~!!

5. Sometimes I pretend I'm sleeping (usually in the cars lah, but most of the time I WAS SLEEPING) and starts listening to secrets that some people would only share when I'm not around. Sometimes they would also talk about people they think I don't know. Hahaha~ Peeps, I KNOW UR SECRETS.. ^^

6. I'm a hypocrite. I know that. People say that to me also. But...I have one question. What in the world is a H.Y.PO.C.R.I.T.E.???

7. I'm sadistic.

8. I'm people.

9. I'm realistic. (eh, ni pun kategori evil meh????)

10. I pretend I like something when I actually don't. Like someone's cooking.. If it tasted...uhm...not that good, I'd pretend I like it, and force it down my throat like I did when eating Oat Crackers my mom forced me to eat with my brother when I was a kid... Hahah.. Those were the days....After I couldn't force it down anymore, my brother told me to throw it out the window. Sorry mom! I love U! Just not the Oat.

11. I got into a fight once, I choked my opponent until she turned a bit blue, then I let go. Kejam kan?? hahahaha~~~ (this actually was only in my imagination.....I wanted to do that so much I kept on repeating the evil things I'm gonna do to her over and over again..haha)

12. I hid MILOs back when I was a kid so that I can eat it alone, and my brother and little sisters won't get their hands on it. Hahaha tamak kan?? miahaha

13. I'd secretly read my sister's diary in her room.... Sometimes I read it with my brother.... Then we both laughed at the contents. MIAHAHAHA~ Well, she was very emotional at those times........

14. The contents of her diary were sometimes the topic of my conversations with my brother.

15. When she stopped writing diaries, or she started hiding them well enough, my brother and I started a new hobby. Making her life miserable! As she did ours.. But, well, we kinda lost in that battle. She'd always win.............coz she's older. Darn it!

16. Sometimes I tell people I don't have money, when I actually do, it's just that I don't wanna use it. But when I say I don't have money, it actually means I'm saving money. Haha~ Sometimes people would start spending me stuffs when I said those lines. Feel a tad of guilt there, that's why sometimes I run away. Hahahaha~

Uhm... I ran out of ideas.........Hmm...

Ok, honestly, I can't think of any BRIGHT EVIL DOINGS I did in the past years. All I did was....sorry to say....SAFE. Good. Hahaha~ Perasan lah tu.. Kikiki!

But I'm not good kay?

I'm eeeeviiiiLLLLLL~~~
Hail to my EVILNESS! A book yet to be written.....
Hmm..... Am I good? Or am I evil?????

Saturday, February 12, 2011

A Call To Reduce Stress

Warning: This entry may contain some Sabahan Slang that some people might not understand. To those who don't understand, I pity you guys..... Hahaha!! =P

Tuut tuut....
tuut tuut...

(Somebody picked up the phone)

Adik: Ya? Apa ko mau??

Aku: Ui naaa....kejam juga ko... Aku call mau tanya khabar jak bah...

Adik: Ko mau cakap ngan mami?

Aku: Ngan ko pun boleh- (cut off)

(Sis gave the phone to mom, continued playing video games)

Mom: Yea?

Aku: Uhmm....Hai mak!

Mom: Ya3... Hai... (The tone of voice seems so uninterested in me....)

Aku: Mak!! Lusa aku exam!!

Mom: Oh.... (Suara macam distracted skit) Exam uda habis?

Aku: Uhm......(cis....) Lusa kami exam mak...

Mom: Oh, bah Good Luck.

(I can hear clicking sound in the background)

Aku: Mak, (trying to have a conversation) aku boleh makan uda sikit2 mak!

Mom: Oh....bukan ko memang makan jak kah kerja? (Ceh...)

Aku: Bukan bah... Kan masa aku balik hari tu aku kurang makan? Kadang2 tidak makan tu?

Mom: Iya ka?

Aku: A'ah... Sekarang aku boleh uda makan sikit2.

Mom: Oh... Baguslah....

Aku: . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

And then I started blabbering about how life is now for me, how stressful I am (ya ka??), how I wanted to eat Ice Cream so much, blahblahblah. I did everything I could to have a conversation with her.. I was bored....


Mom: Ko tau ka? (Sounds excited suddenly)

Aku: Apa? (Mood lifted)

Mom: Aku benci betul CityVille Dadi.... Banyak betul Neighbour dia... Senang jak ni mau level up.

Aku: . . . . . . . HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~ Mami mami.......

Moral of the story.
Don't call home when Mom and Dad are busy playing with games.
Call only at appropriate times..which is when?
They are playing with Facebook games 24/7!

Xpa la,
Mom! It was nice talking to you!!!

Friday, February 11, 2011

Why Eating Is No Longer My Top Priority

1. I need to save money.

2. I can't eat that much anymore. My stomach seems to be rejecting the food. (This might be a good thing for me.... Diet3..LOL)

3. I don't think that food are that much fun anymore. I got bored.....Except for ice creams...and milk....and Corn Flakes...and chocolates....and biscuits......and the list goes on....

4. I find that my notes are much more interesting and fun to chew on.

5. If I get hungry, I can always eat my laptop.

6. My stomach plays the most beautiful songs in the world when the hydrochloric acid are rupturing the wall of my mucosal layer. Lagu NegaraKu, Seiring dan Sejalan, Sabah Tanah AirKu, dan banyak lagi...

7. I found better things to do during lunch.....SLEEP.

8. A bird told me that Carbohydrate makes me fat. 0.o

9. I exercise..... (Bwahaha~ Ketara menipu..)

10. I pity those kids in Africa who died of hunger. To show my sympathy towards them, I refrain from eating... (Except from ice creams, chocolates, cornflakes, blahblahblah)

11. Diet. (Ya lah tu Zen.....)

12. I think that the makcik who prepares food here at the cafe has been planning to poison me for a very long time now. She wants me dead....coz she's jealous of my teddy bear. I'M NOT GIVING IT AWAY U *******!! Ehem3......

13. I'm trying to save Spongebob and his friends. How? Well, do you know, everytime you eat, you produce waste in the room water (Direct translation: bilik air), and the waste goes down the drain? Well, what you don't know is that after the drain, it will go to the sea. And........ who lives in a pineapple under the sea? (Lagu tema bermula...)
Spongebob Squarepants!
Absorbant and yellow and porous is he!
Spongebob Squarepants!

(tiba2 nyanyi lagu Spongebob)

Ok, back to saving Spongebob. If there are a lot of waste in the sea, will Spongebob be able to live with all that....unnecessary "chocolate"? No!
So, I eat less, so less waste, which results in happy kids watching Spongebob still alive on TV!! Yeay!!

14. Uhm...... I dunno... I guess I just wanna be skinny and sexy like her.

Cantik kan? XD

Pic credit to Google Image.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

I Don't Have OCD

A.K.A Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

I don't have it.

I'm not obsessive.

So what if I tend to arrange my money accordingly?
The ones with a larger value at the back, while the ones with a smaller value in front?

So what if I like to arrange my money with the heads on one side and unfolded the crumpled ones?
It's neater that way.

So what if I can't stand seeing that some pens are not closed properly?
I know it's kinda annoying if I suddenly shout to my friends to put the cap on that pen back on.
But it irritates me sometimes.

So what if I can't stand seeing odd numbers especially when turning up the volume of my mp4? (which is now missing...huhu)
I don't like to turn it up to odd numbers, 3, 5, 7 and such.
I like to add a little bit just to make it even.

So what if I don't like the wires of my laptops, chargers, printers to get all tangled up?
So what if I tie it neatly using some rubber bands I stole from the Cafe?
I like them neat okay?

So what if I don't like it if people touch my stuffs and not handling it the way I want it?
I like the way I live,
it's who I am.

So what if I write in my blog with perfect sentences?
And minding my grammar and also my lower cases and upper cases.
It's neat kay?

So what if I don't like it if I see some people having some grammar mistakes in their writing or their speeches.
I'm just correcting something that needs correcting.

So what?
So what???

It doesn't mean that I have OCD.

If that is what they call OCD,
then they haven't met my brother.

And I'm Feeling....GOOOOOOODD~~~

Curi sedikit dari lagu Michael Buble Feeling Good.

Yesterday went to 1Borneo with some of my friends.

I know what you're thinking.

"Berjalan je budak ni, exam dah dekat!"

"Tak study ke???"

Bukan selalu BAH.

The first party, which comprises of 4 people went to KK with my dad.

We got there at my Fa's workplace at about 8.15am.

My tummy was starting to deny the presence of the Milo that I had this morning.

And I need to get REAL food in there.
Luckily my dad brought us to go eat breakfast.

Dad, it's like you had read my mind.


Later, we united with the second party, which comprises of only one person. do we still call it a party?
Ah, biar lah.

Now we are 5.

Cukup2 ahli buat Power Rangers.

Makan Mcflurry di Karamunsing,
And then we went by foot to uhm......hmm....where?
I don't know...
Kawan bawa,
aku ikut je.
X amik tahu pun.

Singgah Centre Point,
Just went there a few days ago with my family.
Lost a couple of hundreds that day,
Good times,
good times.....

kami pegi naik shuttle bas pegi 1B.
It's free.
Nasib baik.

We waited an hour before we get to ride the bus with some tourist.
Tourist comes first ah..
well.....comes second.

dalam bas tu aku tertidur.
Almost to the point where I don't give a hoot to the surroundings,
and just sleep, sleep, sleep.


Arrived at 1Borneo.
Makan gula2,
kna marah2,
and last but not least,

Bangganya aku dapat mengalahkan 1 orang kawan aku ni!!!

Dia kalahkan aku dalam game main drum,
I said the reason i lost was because I'm still new.

Pastu, dia bawa main 1 game ntah apa namanya tu.
I don't know how to play,
but after a few seconds of playing,
I scored a goal.

I now know how to play!
And I LOVE it!!!!!!

The final score was 8-3.
I scored an 8.


And that's about it.

Haih Zen,
Now you don't have anymore reason to not study.
Study Zen. Study.
Your PA wants to meet you after the holidays.
You don't want to feel guilty meeting her right?

So, study Zen study...